Friday, May 10, 2013

Let Them Eat Cake

I have been thinking about the pounds I try to loose day after day, week, after week, month after month, and year after year. I love food. I love to eat it, I love to cook it, I love to take pictures of it and I love to celebrate with it. I use food for so many different areas of my life that I even use food for my social status! I brag about my mad skills in all things food and nutrition but here I am struggling with my weight. You would think that I could put all these great skills to good use and I would be fit and healthy. Blueberries for antioxidants, Dark Cherries for anti-inflammatory's, and Salmon for Omega-3! This is what is sounds like after awhile. "Blah, blah, blah...". 
 What good am I doing myself if I am going to eat whatever I want anyway? Well I'll tell you, I am going to be healthier for trying! How many women self hate because they can't seem to stay on a D**T? (Damn that Dirty four letter word)! I start out with all of the best intentions; egg whites with spinach for breakfast, grilled chicken salad for lunch, grilled chicken for dinner with steamed veggies on the side, and for desert a handful of almonds.....I feel.... well behaved! Day two, mixing it up, and eating oatmeal with berries, tuna (dry) with lettuce for lunch, and for dinner baked salmon and steamed veggies, and snack time is plain Greek yogurt with fruit! Can you see where this is going? Boredom! Really, who wants everything to be steamed, baked, or grilled day in and day out? Not me! 
That kind of eating is sustainable for a little while and then cold stark reality sets in; Bar-B-Q this weekend with the family! Ribs drenched in sweet sticky sauce! Potato Salad! Homemade Coleslaw and Ice cold Beer!!!! What's a girl to do? A real girl! A girl who can't wait to pop a top, listen to some great music and eat all that home cooking and feel like I fit in with the crowd! So I go along and eat and drink my way through the party of food, fun, and sun until it's all said and done. And I have a damn good time too! Until the guilt sets in and the anxiety, and the failure thing adds to the mix and then I am back to square one. I have learned that one thing is true, you can't beat yourself up day after day. That's how I got myself into this weight  problem in the first place. I gave up on me for years and watched my weight steadily climb higher and higher. Finally, Sunday night I am laying awake in bed and thinking to myself, "You can start fresh tomorrow...". Get up and eat right! Go for a walk! Drink lots of water! Get over and move on girl! Rah, Rah Rah!

And so here I go again, eating right, drinking plenty of fluids, watching Dr. Oz for the latest and greatest new way to get slim, trim, and sexy!
You know what? I only lost a pound this week and next week I might gain two but overall I am slowly gaining ground on my struggles with food. I've learned it's Ok to get sideways and Live my life. So long as I can keep striving to improve upon myself and accept that I am real everything will be alright...
I think I can have my cake and eat it too...
So in the words of a very infamous woman, I say, "Let them eat cake!".

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Getting Ready to turn into Godzilla

     So here it is again, seven days of hell. Every month the monster gets loose, I try to plan ahead and figure out how to slay this damn thing, but I have yet to get a grip. Seven days before my period and I am miserable and so is everyone else around me, by God if I have to suffer I guess they do to.

     It sucks spending one quarter of the month as a crying, bitchy, ravenous monster! I want to eat half of Texas and then cry immediately afterwards because I'm fat. I want to tell everyone and everyone I know to get fucked, and I want them to understand what I am going through and love me in spite of the torture they are experiencing. Is that to much to ask? I think not!

I just need some understanding and possibly some really good hormones!

Monday, June 7, 2010

Tripped, Stumbled, and Fell Flat on My Face!

     It happens to me all the time, I get myself all psyched up and ready to start a new project and then Blam! I get hit with everything in the book! My week has been over the top, my grandson was born on Monday and my granddaughter was born on Friday! How crazy is that? In between the population explosion there was all the regular drama, homework, errands, helping my daughter move in and get situated.
     I thought getting older meant slowing down...